the christian approach to sex

christian_sex

The human approach to sex is indeed fascinating and the effect that these love chemicals have on our life choices is extraordinary. The physical sensations associated with sex are so desirable that many people make quite illogical decisions in order to experience them.

Christians particularly recognise the ridiculous nature of our attachment to these chemicals, and have concocted a number of useful rules to help people better understand and control these urges.

rule 1 – we the men must not become loafs of bread to prostitutes and wayward wives

Say to wisdom, “You are my sister,” and call understanding your kinsman; they will keep you from the adulteress, from the wayward wife with her seductive words. Proverbs 7:4-5

The main problem with sex is women. According to Proverbs Chapter 6, women are immoral and wayward, they have smooth tongues, captivating eyes, can reduce you to a loaf of bread and prey upon your very life. If you keep your father’s commands (not specified) and your mother’s teaching (not specified) you will be spared the indignity of the baker’s oven.

rule 2 – we the wives must succumb to sex on demand

Lots of wives have become experts at making up excuses to avoid something that’s extremely important to their husband. Don’t be one of them.

Excuses, Excuses, to keep your man at bay—
The devil will supply them if you can’t think what to say.
When wives won’t give their husbands sex, then everybody loses,
But Heaven’s floodgates open when we stop making excuses!

According to lovinglifeathome, headaches, exhaustion or sheer lack of interest need to be overcome by good Christian wives in order to sexually satisfy randy Christian husbands. Because otherwise, their randy Christian husbands will have no option but to lust after the beauty of a smooth tongued adulteress. Over 8,000 people on Facebook liked this post. Odd that the first two comments are from sex-giving Christian wives confused about how the devil Devil found their unfaithful husbands.

rule 3 – we the Christians should behave like 1st century Jews and bring back the death penalty for sex outside heterosexual marriage

Homosexual behavior was nearly non-existent within first-century Judaism because it was outlawed in their culture.  Sexual behavior of all kind outside of the marriage covenant was punishable by death.  If someone was caught molesting a child—death.  Adultery—death.  Prostitution—death.  As astounding as it may be for our twenty-first century American mindset, within that culture men and women would have sex only with their spouse.

Askthebigot brings up some excellent points here and shows a stunning grasp of the history of mankind. The death penalty is clearly what’s required to help people see beyond the sex chemicals and behave appropriately. Undoubtedly we’re fools if we think there were gay or adulterous Jews in the first century. Men and women would only have had sex with their spouse.

summary

The Christian approach to sex is a guiding light for today’s animalistic, sex-obsessed society. In order to see beyond the chemicals, our friends in Christian-land give us three clear and god God godly rules, which I shall summarise for your lusty benefit:

  1. women are evil sluts, men are victims
  2. wives should have sex on demand
  3. death penalty for anyone who has sex with a not heterosexual spouse
Advertisements