the morality of creating life


To force the false right to a child for those who can not naturally produce one (heterosexual or homosexual) will create a modern day slave trade. [Hewhoshallnotbenamed]

Reproduction is a fascinating topic for me. I have never had the famed biological urge to reproduce. As a young adult, I had no expectation of ever having children and didn’t have the longing for children I’ve heard most other people experience.

So I was able to base my decision on breeding on pure logic. And in my early 20s, I came to the conclusion that it would be illogical to have children – I would be forcing an unconsenting being into existence. However, logic only took me so far in this decision-making. Love came into play, as the subject obviously affected both me and my boyfriend, and he had such a severe longing for children that our relationship continuing became cruel. After seven years, we split up.

Serendipity brought us back together after over a year on opposite sides of the planet. Love was stronger than logic for me after the pain of separation, and I also recognised that, however I feel about the crushing weight of responsibility, reproduction is a natural part of human life.

Now I’m the tired yet delighted mother of one unconsenting human being, trying and failing to make another human being. What have I learned about reproduction and parenting in this emotional and logical rollercoaster?

  • I don’t tell anyone else if and how they have the right to be a parent.

My experience is unique to me, it doesn’t tell me anything about how other people approach parenthood, and it can’t be used to inform my opinion about whether other people should make, or parent, other human beings. I’ll leave that to the professionals: to the doctors, the social workers, the psychologists and the heath visitors. I’ll leave it to them to inform our law-makers about the most ethical and sensible guidelines our society can follow. But if at some point in the future we all decide it’s illogical to create new human beings, I’ll understand why. Until potential humans can sign a consent form, it does kind of seem unethical.