32 reasons to be an atheist (as opposed to a Christian)


  1. You don’t have to get up on Sunday mornings if you don’t feel like it.
  2. You don’t have to sing songs that are too high for your voice and leave you with a sore throat.
  3. You don’t have to fake smile at people all the time and pretend the god God is making your life wonderful.
  4. You can stop pretending that three gods are one god.
  5. You don’t have to worry about the bad angel, the Devil, tempting you and you can just go about your daily business like a normal person, making reasonable choices about your behaviour.
  6. You don’t have to obsess about not having thoughts that are natural, that would actuallylead nowhere (would lead nowhere if you don’t try and suppress them, that is).
  7. You can choose your partner or partners based on your attraction to them, not based on if you think the god God has made them for you.
  8. You can have sex at whatever time in a relationship you think is appropriate and not wait till you’ve made a vow you expect to last forever to find out it wasn’t worth waiting for but have to pretend it was so no-one thinks you’re weird and your spouse doesn’t get upset.
  9. If you get married and the relationship fails, you don’t have to worry about being a daily and disobedient sinner when you meet someone else you love and marry them.
  10. If you see a really hot person you are attracted to, you can think whatever you want without worrying about having committed adultery with them during that lustful look.
  11. You don’t have to worry about your god being racist, choosing initially only one small ethnic group of people to care about, and then deciding Europe and America are worth it only in recent years, but Asia is a lost cause for hell fodder.
  12. You don’t have to wonder how the god God would have saved your soul if you’d been born in a region of Papa New Guinea that missionaries haven’t got to.
  13. You can read what Jesus said and see if any of the nice things are useful for your own personal philosophy of living, without worrying why he killed a tree because he was hungry and in a bad mood.
  14. You can relate to animals as the marvellous creatures and clear relations they are, and not as as inferior soulless beings put on earth to provide you with food.
  15. You can say ‘Oh my god!’ like Janice from Friends without feeling guilty and sinful.
  16. You can make logical decisions about all your actions instead of consulting a rule book from 2000 and more years ago that relates to an entirely alien culture.
  17. You can make logical choices about your life decisions instead of looking for signs from a being you can’t see or hear and trying to figure out what of the many coincidences in life is a sign.
  18. You can put a nice statue of Buddha up in your living room.
  19. You can tell your parents they are being ridiculous and stupid if they are being ridiculous and stupid.
  20. You don’t have to look for interpretations of the Bible that agree with your view on life.
  21. If you’re gay, you can have a relationship that corresponds to your sexual attraction matrix without having to justify all the bits of the Bible that say it’s a sin.
  22. You can look at natural wonders and be truly amazed by them instead of thinking an all-powerful deity made them on a whim or plan.
  23. You don’t have to worry that every political shift in the world is a sign of the inevitable end times.
  24. You don’t have to worry about dying because there’s no sense that maybe you didn’t make it with your brand of faith (what if the Mormons are right?).
  25. You can let your children make up their mind about life, and not brainwash them from birth with a specific belief.
  26. You can deal with your children’s natural development phases in a relaxed manner and not put inconvenient behaviour down to original sin.
  27. You can face life like an independent adult and not keep clinging to an imaginary parent figure.
  28. You don’t have to try and reconcile your benevolent god God with the horrible things he did in the Old Testament.
  29. You can read the Bible as a historical text without feeling you should believe the ark was real or Moses spoke to a burning bush.
  30. You can admit that it’s not nice to tradesmen to have their business vandalised by an angry man with a whip who has a ‘moral’ problem with their established way of earning a living but won’t simply do magic (at this point) to prove he’s right.
  31. You don’t have to worry about the shocking under-representation of women in the Bible, and wonder why only men have the lead roles.
  32. You can delight in the fact that you are alive at a time when evolution has brought humanity to the stage where you have answers for existence in science, and you don’t have to succumb to your natural superstitious instincts that drive human curiosity about life. Theism is natural but atheism is the next rung on the ladder.